I don’t really blog about current events, most of you know.
So I was pretty content to let the Caitlyn Jenner thing run its course… Until
the hate just became too much to ignore.
In all honesty, I believe most trans people think of Caitlyn
as drop in the bucket as far as their “heroes” are concerned. For me, my heroes,
from an early age, have been amazing inspirational women like Melanie AnnPhillips, Lynn Conway, and more recently Laverne Cox, Laura Jane Grace, and
lesser-known everyday transwomen like Carla Andrea Glose and single trans moms
like Jessica Inadream on Youtube. There have even been a few trans men, such as
Lewis Hancox, Ian Harvie, and the guy going by Transmansable on Youtube and
Tumblr—who may not be the most well-known, nor wish to be—but he’s a phenomenal
speaker and I’ve followed him for quite some time.
Those are the people that I think of as the most moving, the
most brave, the most pivotal.
Don’t get me wrong. I am proud of Caitlyn Jenner. That’s the
feeling I have for her: Pride.
I am proud of her for sticking up for herself—for putting
herself out there—and for being who she is with no apologies. It was brave, and it was a call-out to the public—being a person who is very much in the
public spotlight. But apart from shining a spotlight on the trans community
itself, Caitlyn Jenner is just another new girl in school amongst many.
For us, the spotlight’s not on her.
Perhaps one day she will be a great role model and
spokesperson for trans women. But for now. She’s just starting. She’s a girl.
And she probably doesn’t even realize that yet. That’s how new she is. And I’m
incredibly proud of her for having struggled for so long and risked so much to
come out to the world—literally.
Go Caitlyn. I’m in your corner.
But like many trans women I speak to, I’m a little jealous of you. And, I’ll call it what it is—jealousy.
The amount of money you have personally underrepresents our
struggles--it’s true. But the real issue with that problem is not so much that we are publically
underrepresented in that light. Anyone that Googles “transgender” will discover
there are a myriad of trans people across the nation and globe coping with
financial difficulties, fruitless job searches, and healthcare issues.
The real issue is just plain old jealousy. You went from being known as “Bruce” to being known as “Caitlyn” (and outwardly becoming a beautiful Caitlyn) practically overnight. I can’t help but feel a little jealous that you accomplished this so easily. This is the same kind of jealousy I have for trans girls that are in their teens though—It’s dwarfed by my enthusiasm for your ability to recoup quicker, and enjoy a more satisfying life.
The fact that you have lived some 60 years before this moment as someone you couldn’t stand makes that enthusiasm even better. It makes me even more elated that you are finally able to be complete and happy.
But, as I am sure you are aware, transitioning is not simply an outside thing. It’s not something that’s done in a few months.
I know.
I started HRT when I was 26. I am nearly 29 now. But HRT had a quick effect on me. I changed way more drastically than many. By six months, everyone was addressing me as ma’am, even in masculine clothing. And in only eight months I was living my life entirely authentically, as Laura.
People have told me how lucky I am too. And that I don’t
know their struggles. And that I had it easy.
No. I’ve had some pretty horrible struggles, as I am sure you have too, Caitlyn. Being in the public eye for all of this I am SURE has not been easy. It’s an added aspect that most of us don’t have to deal with. You exchange solidarity—which sometimes feels like a cage for many of us—for the ability to come out in the most ideal way you can imagine and that science can support.
And with both your advantages and your struggles you still have a long road to walk, girl. But I’m in your corner, and there are obviously many others. Just know that there are people out there that don’t expect you to walk it perfectly and gracefully as you make your way, step by step, across the gravel.
Like any of us. Sometimes it’s too lonely. Sometimes it’s too much.
We’re proud of you, girl. We’re in your corner. And we look forward to when we can say, Caitlyn taught us a lot. She’s an incredible woman.
Now, changing audiences again, there is one more GIANT thing that the Caitlyn Jenner story can tell us—something we can already learn from. And that is simply this:
Caitlyn Jenner is a remarkable example of what proper and immediate healthcare could do for the transgender community. Her transition was nearly seamless. She got everything she needed, and didn’t have to wait. She didn’t have to fight with health insurance. She probably went to a trained doctor, not a doctor she had to train. And she didn’t have to jump through a billion hoops as practitioners tried to squeeze as many visits out of her as they could—she’s Caitlyn Jenner, her card’s good here.
Healthcare, if you can do that for a 60 year old woman with
massive hormonal issues—you’ve failed most of us.
