So, I wrote this blog post.
It’s perfect—Not necessarily long, but I made sure it’s not too short, either.
It’s witty just where you’d want it to be, full of those cute little anecdotes people use, and links to other blogs, editorials, and a Youtube video or two. Because “credibility” today is as easy to buy as pumpkin pie spice in the fall.
It’s interesting though. When I was a child, I absolutely hated pumpkin pie.That surely must mean something.
Here, I used plenty of politically correct terms. I made sure it reads aggressive but agreeable. Everyone will practically want to sing along with all the pandering, like it’s one of those songs about being who you are; there is plenty left to interpretation. And of course, I stayed on topic, and by that I mean I included the same topic that’s already being discussed everywhere:
Donald Trump is an idiot.
Hilary Clinton is a snake.
Please post this blog in your magazine.
Their are almost no grammatical errors. And almost no Internet slang, ftw. And the vocabulary is near entirely perspicuous. The one thing that got me was coming up with three hundred words to type.
But that’s alright. I’m about to transition back into my main point here:
Please post this blog in your magazine.
Please.
Of course, right about now, those shitheads don’t realize this is a parody, and instead they are stealing someone else’s intellectual property right from under their fucking noses. What assholes! So Mister Editor, don’t forget to scrutinize that wording (just like you scrutinize sources and quotes, right?) or the PC police “is gonna to take a shit right on your head!”
You can’t post this blog in your magazine.
Alright, so if you recognized this at all or happened to click on the right link above, you might be wondering why I am focusing so much on NOFX lately (especially if you saw my last video was also a cover of one of NOFX's songs). To be totally and completely honest, I've simply been listening to them a lot lately. Their music meant so much to me growing up, living such a sheltered life; it was one of the things that lead me to wake up, start thinking, and leave the Jehovah's Witness cult.
Now, having gone through a load of inner turmoil and growth over the past year, I find myself hearing new things in what these songs are saying that I couldn't pick up on as a heavily brain-washed 16-year-old, and I can't help but be so impressed by them. "180 Degrees" really became symbolic to me of how much my feelings have changed in the past year, and what type of person I want to be. So I guess you would say this past month was a NOFX tribute month. If you didn't realize, this post, which I had a lot of fun writing, was my spin on the song "Please Play This Song On The Radio."
